hurry the day when
i may be out of the race
say what i like
spit peas out at night.
perhaps this time will be gold
methinks if it were
my heart would breathe at last
my tears might be less and
my shoulder more able
refuse to drip blood
and do not ooze
stay within me so i may
be thicker with myself.
the brightest light
flies ahead, calling
back as the avant-garde.
the mass of strength
trusts her sight and
as she holds her
a glimmer to begin and
the mass to cover the
a lump too
i gather the falls of my life
and make a pile; a lump too
bulky to kick along this endless dusty road.
with a shiver of power
a candle lit is added,
innocent only seconds before.
the lick of fire creates
waxen tears as the felled pile erupts.
through the flames
the road is clear.
leaf claws extend from the stump of a frangipani arm
as i walk beneath the moon's first slipper;
evening frost of a sunfilled day dampens my skin;
touching my cheek brings me back into my surrounds.
i am reminded of the earth as it spins
the reality of asphalt
the intrusion of traffic lights
the harsh treatment of mind over body
and the simplicity of my heart.
how desperately i try to control my tears.
clutching my clothes to gain strength to overcome
a wrenching need to pour my eyes away completely.
a cool instruction binding me closed:
and don't be sad.
i don't know how to speak of her.
not strange as she has no words of her own.
objectively though, you'd think there was
a chance to have her stated, even blankly;
for one crushed – just existing.
we even know the cause of extinguishment
– time and circumstance the assassin –
what is that though but dough for baking
into bread – cut spread and eaten, it passes
through to become process unto its own extinction.
on from the meal of recognition lies choice.
arise from the table, clear implements,
place all right and know it is complete.
a stage; a section; a feast of self.
or, hover 'mongst the mess of preparation
stagnate with prey eaten; sigh with satiation
and fall slothlike into sleep and dream.
Uninspiring? yes, it is. i agree.
so there are no words to describe her
except, perhaps, she still lives.
i once clenched my jaw and proffered
my chin never wincing as the pincers
gripped and pulled.
the lips that were ground with
another pair accepted any pain as necessary to endure.
but tonight i will proffer my jaw
unclenched; will wait to feel the
pincers lose interest.
tonight the razor edge of
discovery will slash away
the other pair of lips
which bind me to pain.
i shall wrench myself
free with one slash.
one bright red slash.
'tis a vision of the
pool of blood which
spurs me on.
to emerge smeared and sinewed
to the surface. wait for
the reddish veil to slip
and see sights clear.
a cry in the inner sanctum
a corridor out
step quickly into it
you see the door – its open!
now – OUT.
and don't turn back,
for if you do you'll see
have a thought to
reach back in and
but she'll be running
to slam the door
and your arm shall be caught
the sound of a bass voice:
a true connection to the
inky black from which we squirt.
should we say sir?
should we say madam.
and the bass booms:
in the black, people,
address does not matter.
remember only your end
by the light of a distant star
a great heard viewed from a distance
hears a scream issue forth.
their heads incline and, intent,
their feet shuffle as they
whisper who its it? who screams?
yes. yes? others mutter and why.
it is one of their own, one
who has left her washed clothes dripping
and views humanity from afar.
to be struck
i do not wish to die
– of course –
but to be struck down dead.
to have a javelin crack gunshot
cleave my shirt into a crimson soak;
hear a shrill ring build until
i fall bent to my knees as
the grey sponge bursts.
to leave in a band
instead of a
is the most demanding voice I have
when cold fictual mass en masse emerges.
over short or long, traversed or un,
above the ready world I sit alone to consider
I am an innately selfish creature and
there are oh so many more of me.
true, with a desire – even though 'tis only
an inkling – toward generosity.
ah – but this I see is trace of survival
behold the species and be brave.
a slim juggler of buttered curls
attempting to ignore a
bites at specific points
in her self made arcs.
no time to pine
whilst she remains in action
fear not the motion
as it is self which propels.
the feet are firmly planted after all.